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Soul Eater Chapter 75: Sex and the Single Chainsaw
Everybody sing along with the TMI Song!
Too much information
No was not aware
Too much information
What makes you think I care
I could have made it through this day
Feeling perfectly OK
Having never heard a single word
That you just chose to say
Too much information
Yes, that is a real song. Yes, that is a song by Kevin Bacon's band. Yes, Kevin Bacon is in a band. No, really. Kevin Bacon is in a band and he wrote a song called "T.M.I." and yes, this is a real thing and I am not making it up.
So this is basically the chapter where we find out all about Giricco's sex life. Allllll about Giricco's sex life. Really.
I mean, Tsubaki and Black Star and Blair add to the TMI party too, but Giricco is just wow. WOW.
So we start right where we left off last month, with Maka sitting down in the Sloth chapter and throwing herself a pity-party while Soul looks on with a most excellent 0.o expression on his face.
"What the hell are you talking about...?" Soul says.
"I'm sorry... None of this is your fault, Soul... I'm the only one at fault here..."
Gears. Oh my. A full page shot of gears. Gosh, Ohkubo, think you could be a little bit more subtle with the foreshadowing there?
"Go on without me..." Maka says again.
Soul reacts about how you would expect him to react. "Okay, so, all of a sudden you're apologizing to me, but you won't tell me the reason that you're apologizing... You honestly think I'm going to obediently listen to you when you're like this?!"
"Why not...?" Maka asks. "After all, I'm nothing more than extra baggage for you, Soul. I'm not strong like Black Star or Kid... I can't do anything by myself..."
"How can you say something like that...?" Soul stares at her. "Look, it's because of the book's influence that we're getting burdened with these stupidly exaggerated sins... This isn't the time to be saying all of this weird crap that I don't understand!"
"Soul, you also saw something in the previous chapter, didn't you..."
"!!"
Soul is sweatdropping and ellipsing, so I guess that means that it's time for another flashback to the Envy chapter. Good grief. "It's because you're from a musical family, isn't it... You just wanted to run away from me, didn't you..." Wes says. I can see that ellipses abuse runs in the family, apparently. "That's why you partnered with that Maka girl, who couldn't understand anything about music... As long as you were with her, you didn't have any reason to feel jealous of me. That's it, isn't it?" Wes smiles creepily. "Are you happy now? Good for you."
Back in the present, Soul looks at Maka and says again, "No. I didn't see anything."
And all of a sudden HOLY FUCKING SHIT Giricco is RIGHT BEHIND SOUL
STANDING THERE
DOING NOTHING
DOING NOTHING
OH, GIRICCO! He's too goddamn lazy to even make a dramatic entrance this time, I guess.
So Giricco is standing around and mentions casually, "I've been waiting and waiting for you lazy assholes to show up. Why are you still sitting around here blah blah blahing at each other?" Note: Giricco actually uses the phrase abura uru to describe Soul and Maka, which literally means "selling oil" but is actually a Japanese idiom that means "chit-chatting." So in English we shoot the breeze, but in Japan I guess they sell oil. Idioms are awesome!
Giricco glares at Soul. "Don't make me tired of waiting anymore, now!"
Soul makes an epic HOSHIT face. "YOU'RE--!!"
HE'S THAT GUY! YOU KNOW, THAT ONE GUY! THAT ONE GUY THAT YOU FOUGHT LIKE FIFTY CHAPTERS AGO AND THEN NEVER SAW AGAIN!!
Yeah it's no wonder that Soul is so busy recognizing Giricco (hey, it's gonna take his brain a few seconds to pull this off, since it's been so long!) that he doesn't have time to react before Giricco kicks him in the face.
Maka finally shows a reaction. "SOUL!!" But apparently she still isn't particularly inclined to get up out of that chair, not even when Giricco is suddenly standing right in front of her, looming over menacingly. "We've met before," he says. Then he grabs Maka and throws her down on top of one of the beds, pinning her down as he climbs on top of her. "Remember how last time I said that if you ten years older, I'd totally get me a piece of that...? I changed my mind! I think I'm going to have a little fun with you right now, girly!!"
Wait, Giricco changed his mind? Oh. Right. Because he's fucking a seventeen-year-old guillotine now. That might account for why he doesn't seem to care about whether his tail is underage or not anymore.
At first Maka is like 0.0
But then she's like ».»
"You can do whatever you want..." Maka says.
OMG. Giricco's face. "ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?! YOU FUCKING LITTLE SHITHEAD!! SCREAM!! SHOW ME SOME FUCKING TERROR ALREADY!! When a bitch just lies there during a fuck it's no fun even if I kill her after!!"
(Hey Justin, are you aware of the filthy, filthy things that your boyfriend is saying right now? Probably more importantly, are you aware that he's, like, cheating on you? With a fourteen-year-old girl?)
(By the way, no, I'm really not exaggerating with the vulgarity in the translation here. Giricco really is screaming that jawdropping dialogue at Maka. Really.)
"You bitch!!" Giricco goes on. "You're the bitch who killed Arachne!! Fuck!! Arachne wasn't the type of woman who shoulda got killed by some chick who just lies there during a fuck like you do!! Come on, cry already!! Gimme some reason to enjoy this!!"
(Edited to add: Yes, actually, Giricco is throwing around another interesting Japanese idiom right here, but I left it out of the translation because I was trying not to detract from the, er, obscenity of Giricco's dialogue. Anywhoo, there's an explanation in the comments now [see link] if you're curious. And now back to your regularly scheduled shounen manga snuff film.)
Giricco draws back his arm. "Guess I'm just gonna have to rip open your guts with a chainsaw after all!! Are you ready? Give me a good 'KYAAAAAAA' when I do it! Yeah, a good 'KYAAAAAAA' is what I wanna hear!! Gimme a good scream now!! HERE WE G--"
And then Soul kicks Giricco in the head.
Giricco goes flying off the bed, looks up at Soul, and screams. "KYAAAAAAA!! KYAAAAAAA!!" Then he throws back his head, and his screams turn into laughter. "GYAAAAA HA HA!! HA! HA HA! HA HA! GYA HA HA!! GYA HA HA!! GYAHA!! GYAHA!! GYA HA HA HA!! ARE YOU SOME SORTA PRINCE SAVIN' THE DAMSEL?!" So, stating the obvious here: Giricco has gone crazy. "YOU SOME SORTA HOTSHOT OR SOMETHING?! HEY, YOU TRYIN' TO SAY SOMETHING ABOUT HOW I COULDN'T PROTECT ARACHNE OR SOME SHIT? I'LL FUCKING KILL YOU!!"
Well, of all the meltdowns I ever expected to see Giricco to have... Yeah, okay, that was actually right at the top of the list. So he does actually give a shit about what happened to Arachne, after all! Although, on the other hand, I personally thought that we would be more likely to see Giricco show some evidence of getting pissed at or blaming Noah before we were going to see a Fruedian slip about him blaming himself for Arachne's death.
Giricco! He's like an onion! You know, with the layers and stuff! We're learning all sorts of interesting things about him this chapter! For example: He's a pedophile! He likes rough sex! He rapes and murders women as a hobby, apparently! He's a bit sensitive about the whole sleeping-through-Arachne's death thing!
I hereby declare this chapter the official Giricco Gives TMI Chapter. Because, wow. I mean, just wow.
Meanwhile, Maka has at least gotten up off the bed. "Maka, what are you doing?!" Soul snaps at her. "Hurry up and get ready to fight him!!"
Maka holds Soul in his scythe form, but she doesn't look ready to fight at all. In fact, she's staring at Giricco with a deer-caught-in-the-headlights look on her face.
"HERE HE COMES!" Soul shouts.
Well, okay. I guess that the next page is supposed to be Giricco making an attack move against Maka. He looks more like he's busting a move rather than trying to kill someone, though.
Maka barely manages to block Giricco's first kick by holding up Soul's handle, but unfortunately doing so leaves her lower body and legs unprotected. "BELOW!!" Soul shouts. Maka barely manages to block Giricco in time to save her legs from getting amputated. Except that she's blocking with Soul's handle again, instead of swinging his blade down like he asked her to.
Suddenly one of the zombie girls from the Envy chapter is there. I guess this is what Index meant when he said that the sins of each chapter would keep following them into each subsequent chapter. Huh. "You couldn't even swing a mop, let alone a proper scythe," the zombie girl says.
Giricco manages to kick Soul's blade with enough force to send Maka flying backward.
"MAKA!!" Soul shouts. "We're in the middle of a battle! CONCENTRATE!"
"You're just a cowardly girl, making the men do everything for you..." another zombie says.
Maka makes a sad face and sad ellipses. Giricco kicks her again.
"Every time I think we're getting somewhere, it's like we're starting all over again..." Giricco says. "Man, even I'm getting bored with this shit... Maybe I should just finish you off with one quick atttack and be done with it..."
Soul grits his teeth and reaches his breaking point. (Wait, Soul in scythe form is still NOT NAKED ANYMORE? GDI, Ohkubo, this is starting to piss me off! Especially since Tsubaki and Liz and even Jackie are still always naked in their weapon forms. I mean, come on!) Anywhoo, Soul transforms back into his human form, steps in front of Maka, stares Giricco down, and says, "Maka, you just stand back there and watch." Soul turns his arm into a blade. "I'll fight him alone."
MEANWHILE!
Chapter Seven: Greed
I dunno what all is going on this chapter, but none of Our Heroes appear to be paying attention to the chapter anyway. Patti, Kirikou, and Black Star are mocking Tsubaki and Liz with a chant. "Per~verts! Per~verts! Per~verts! Per~verts! Per~verts!"
Suddenly, Liz and Tsubaki both spotaneously start growing their boobs back!
"Yay, they're back!!" Liz says, grinning.
So this is the final moment, then. Kirikou grins and comments, "This is the moment that will finally decide which of the two of them is the perviest, once and for all..."
Liz and Tsubaki close their eyes, clasp their hands, and pray together. Please don't let me be the last. Please don't let me be the last. Please don't let me be the last!
Aaaaaaand Liz changes back first. "YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!" Liz does a victory fist-pump while Tsubaki stares on in horror.
"No way..." Tsubaki says. "This can't be..."
Liz and Patti point at Tsubaki and start chanting together. "Per~vert! Per~vert! Per~vert! Per~vert! Per~vert!" Meanwhile, Tsubaki changes completely back. But it's too late. The damage is done.
"Oh, man," Black Star says. "I'd better not sleep in the same room with her anymore."
"You sleep in the same room with her?!" Kirikou says. "Dude, you're making me jealous here!"
"It's just because we don't have much space," Black Star says.
Meanwhile, Blair is bored with these shenanigans. Blair yawns loudly, then comments, "Either way, they're both boring women."
Oh, snap. Liz stares at Blair and says, "So, uh, by the way, do you think Blair has gone back to being female yet?"
"No no no, she has to still be a tomcat!!" Tsubaki cuts in, perhaps a bit desperately. "Obviously! Right?"
MEANWHILE!
Tezca, Enrique, Stein, Marie, Sid, and Nygus are standing in what appears to be a forest, looking down at the abandoned church building where Noah is presumably lurking. Because that's all that Noah's been doing for the past couple chapters. Lurking. In between bouts of making ineffective villainous plots and re-organizing his collection of toenail clippings from all of the original members of KISS, Noah pretty much does nothing but lurk around all day, doesn't he?
Well, there was that one time that he did that one thing with the Brew. You know, that one time. That he did that one thing. That one thing that we still haven't found out what exactly it is yet. GDI, Ohkubo. GDI.
"This is it," Tezca says. "This is the hideout that Noah's gang is using. Justin is here, too..."
Why yes, he is. Justin is there. As we can see. As Ohkubo has deemed important enough to show us in one small panel on the bottom of the page. For some reason. Uh.
MEANWHILE!
Noah looks down at his book and comments, "They've reached the Greed chapter."
Waffles looks on with a stoic expression on his face. Noah-samaaaaa, he think-bubbles.
OMFG
HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA
OMG Waffles is just standing there and looking like -_- and he's still actually think-bubbling "Noah-samaaaa" I mean oh my god holy shit
WAFFLES. IS. FUCKING. EPIC.
"I won't let anybody take my collection from me," Noah says.
MEANWHILE!
Giricco is kicking Soul's ass. Like, really kicking Soul's ass. He is kicking Soul's ass all over the room.
"Soul!!" Maka shouts.
Soul makes with an epic arm-blade (is this the first newly-evolved arm blade form we've seen since Soul became a Death Scythe?), but Giricco easily blocks Soul's blade with his foot. "Don't you dare touch my technician!" Soul snarls at Giricco.
"You think I'm gonna let you get away with sayin' shit like that, after you cut my lady to pieces?!" Giricco shoots back.
Giricco smacks Soul around some more, then begins screaming at him again. "HA HA HA HA HA!! Just because you became a Death Scythe, that don't mean that you can fight alone!! Don't get cocky with me, you little shit of a scythe!!"
"I can at least fight alone against some worthless asshole like you!!" Soul shoots back. He's not very convincing with this boast, however, considering that in the very same panel he's gritting his teeth as blood spurts from his shoulder.
"YOU AIN'T NOTHIN' LIKE JUSTIN AN' ME!!" Giricco suddenly shouts. "DON'T FORGET YOUR PLACE!!" Then he kicks Soul in the chest.
Soul goes down. Giricco grabs Soul's arm and says, "Now I'm gonna cut your soul right outta your body. Look and learn, kid."
"GUAAAAAAAAA!" Soul screams as Giricco starts to bloodily cut into him.
"HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!" Giricco laughs as Soul's blood sprays all over him.
Suddenly Giricco lets Soul go. Soul slumps to his knees, blood gushing from his chest. Giricco then kicks Soul hard enough to send him flying across the room. Or the chapter. Room, chapter, whatever.
Maka stares at Soul.
Soul tries to get up, but he can't. Blood gushes from the wounds on his chest. "Dammit..." Soul says to the floor. "I can't do anything alone..." He continues talking to the floor. "But this isn't anything like the courage that Maka has always shown me up until now!"
Maka's soul goes poof!
Giricco gets this look on his face. This uh, did I just see that chick get a powerup from the power of twu wuv? look on his face.
Maka's face sets with determination. I'm such an idiot...
Soul finally manages to stand up. Kind of. Not very well, but at least he's trying. "This time it's my turn to show you what courage really means," he tells Maka.
COURAGE MEANS SUICIDE. That is what I have learned from this chapter.
Maka stares at Soul's back. No matter how much of an effect the book might have on me... For me to not believe in Soul...
MEANWHILE!
"Well, cookie crumb?" Gooberkins asks. "This is 'power'. Free from all reason or restraint, free to recklessly pursue all of your desires. What is the 'power' that you have obtained?"
"A symmetry that surpasses symmetry," Kid answers. "It is called 'oblivion'."
"One who desires power is approaching," Gooberkins says. "The power of your 'oblivion'... Shall we test it out?"
Panel zooms in on Black Star.
Kid grins. "Interesting." He looks down at Black Star. "Very well. I will make out with Black Star."
"...No. No. That's... That's really not what I was talking about."
All joking aside though, blah blah blah end of chapter. Next month: APOCALYPTIC AND VAGUELY HOMOEROTIC FISTFIGHT OF DOOM - THE REMATCH!
Although I, for one, will be incredibly disappointed if it turns out that Black Star is going to punch the crazy out of Kid in a sort of dramatic mirror repetition of what happened when Kid bunched the crazy out of Black Star way back all of those chapters ago. Because that would mean that Liz and Patti would end up contributing nothing to Kid's rescue and JESUS CHRIST OHKUBO, no, we have all been waiting faaaaaaaaaar too long for Liz and Patti to have their Crowning Moment of Awesome in this manga and you are NOT goint to let Black Star steal their thunder, are you? Are you?!
God I hope not.
Meanwhile: Brew? What Brew? Crona? What Crona? Medusa? What Medusa? Pshawwww, details. They're not important anymore.
Edit: Corrected a translation error as pointed out by![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
anitheanimanic. Okay NOW Giricco's line about Justin actually makes sense!
Edit again: And yet again, it is necessary for me to make a public service announcement about one of my recap posts. GDI, fandom. GDI.
Too much information
No was not aware
Too much information
What makes you think I care
I could have made it through this day
Feeling perfectly OK
Having never heard a single word
That you just chose to say
Too much information
Yes, that is a real song. Yes, that is a song by Kevin Bacon's band. Yes, Kevin Bacon is in a band. No, really. Kevin Bacon is in a band and he wrote a song called "T.M.I." and yes, this is a real thing and I am not making it up.
So this is basically the chapter where we find out all about Giricco's sex life. Allllll about Giricco's sex life. Really.
I mean, Tsubaki and Black Star and Blair add to the TMI party too, but Giricco is just wow. WOW.
So we start right where we left off last month, with Maka sitting down in the Sloth chapter and throwing herself a pity-party while Soul looks on with a most excellent 0.o expression on his face.
"What the hell are you talking about...?" Soul says.
"I'm sorry... None of this is your fault, Soul... I'm the only one at fault here..."
Gears. Oh my. A full page shot of gears. Gosh, Ohkubo, think you could be a little bit more subtle with the foreshadowing there?
"Go on without me..." Maka says again.
Soul reacts about how you would expect him to react. "Okay, so, all of a sudden you're apologizing to me, but you won't tell me the reason that you're apologizing... You honestly think I'm going to obediently listen to you when you're like this?!"
"Why not...?" Maka asks. "After all, I'm nothing more than extra baggage for you, Soul. I'm not strong like Black Star or Kid... I can't do anything by myself..."
"How can you say something like that...?" Soul stares at her. "Look, it's because of the book's influence that we're getting burdened with these stupidly exaggerated sins... This isn't the time to be saying all of this weird crap that I don't understand!"
"Soul, you also saw something in the previous chapter, didn't you..."
"!!"
Soul is sweatdropping and ellipsing, so I guess that means that it's time for another flashback to the Envy chapter. Good grief. "It's because you're from a musical family, isn't it... You just wanted to run away from me, didn't you..." Wes says. I can see that ellipses abuse runs in the family, apparently. "That's why you partnered with that Maka girl, who couldn't understand anything about music... As long as you were with her, you didn't have any reason to feel jealous of me. That's it, isn't it?" Wes smiles creepily. "Are you happy now? Good for you."
Back in the present, Soul looks at Maka and says again, "No. I didn't see anything."
And all of a sudden HOLY FUCKING SHIT Giricco is RIGHT BEHIND SOUL
STANDING THERE
DOING NOTHING
DOING NOTHING
OH, GIRICCO! He's too goddamn lazy to even make a dramatic entrance this time, I guess.
So Giricco is standing around and mentions casually, "I've been waiting and waiting for you lazy assholes to show up. Why are you still sitting around here blah blah blahing at each other?" Note: Giricco actually uses the phrase abura uru to describe Soul and Maka, which literally means "selling oil" but is actually a Japanese idiom that means "chit-chatting." So in English we shoot the breeze, but in Japan I guess they sell oil. Idioms are awesome!
Giricco glares at Soul. "Don't make me tired of waiting anymore, now!"
Soul makes an epic HOSHIT face. "YOU'RE--!!"
HE'S THAT GUY! YOU KNOW, THAT ONE GUY! THAT ONE GUY THAT YOU FOUGHT LIKE FIFTY CHAPTERS AGO AND THEN NEVER SAW AGAIN!!
Yeah it's no wonder that Soul is so busy recognizing Giricco (hey, it's gonna take his brain a few seconds to pull this off, since it's been so long!) that he doesn't have time to react before Giricco kicks him in the face.
Maka finally shows a reaction. "SOUL!!" But apparently she still isn't particularly inclined to get up out of that chair, not even when Giricco is suddenly standing right in front of her, looming over menacingly. "We've met before," he says. Then he grabs Maka and throws her down on top of one of the beds, pinning her down as he climbs on top of her. "Remember how last time I said that if you ten years older, I'd totally get me a piece of that...? I changed my mind! I think I'm going to have a little fun with you right now, girly!!"
Wait, Giricco changed his mind? Oh. Right. Because he's fucking a seventeen-year-old guillotine now. That might account for why he doesn't seem to care about whether his tail is underage or not anymore.
At first Maka is like 0.0
But then she's like ».»
"You can do whatever you want..." Maka says.
OMG. Giricco's face. "ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?! YOU FUCKING LITTLE SHITHEAD!! SCREAM!! SHOW ME SOME FUCKING TERROR ALREADY!! When a bitch just lies there during a fuck it's no fun even if I kill her after!!"
(Hey Justin, are you aware of the filthy, filthy things that your boyfriend is saying right now? Probably more importantly, are you aware that he's, like, cheating on you? With a fourteen-year-old girl?)
(By the way, no, I'm really not exaggerating with the vulgarity in the translation here. Giricco really is screaming that jawdropping dialogue at Maka. Really.)
"You bitch!!" Giricco goes on. "You're the bitch who killed Arachne!! Fuck!! Arachne wasn't the type of woman who shoulda got killed by some chick who just lies there during a fuck like you do!! Come on, cry already!! Gimme some reason to enjoy this!!"
(Edited to add: Yes, actually, Giricco is throwing around another interesting Japanese idiom right here, but I left it out of the translation because I was trying not to detract from the, er, obscenity of Giricco's dialogue. Anywhoo, there's an explanation in the comments now [see link] if you're curious. And now back to your regularly scheduled shounen manga snuff film.)
Giricco draws back his arm. "Guess I'm just gonna have to rip open your guts with a chainsaw after all!! Are you ready? Give me a good 'KYAAAAAAA' when I do it! Yeah, a good 'KYAAAAAAA' is what I wanna hear!! Gimme a good scream now!! HERE WE G--"
And then Soul kicks Giricco in the head.
Giricco goes flying off the bed, looks up at Soul, and screams. "KYAAAAAAA!! KYAAAAAAA!!" Then he throws back his head, and his screams turn into laughter. "GYAAAAA HA HA!! HA! HA HA! HA HA! GYA HA HA!! GYA HA HA!! GYAHA!! GYAHA!! GYA HA HA HA!! ARE YOU SOME SORTA PRINCE SAVIN' THE DAMSEL?!" So, stating the obvious here: Giricco has gone crazy. "YOU SOME SORTA HOTSHOT OR SOMETHING?! HEY, YOU TRYIN' TO SAY SOMETHING ABOUT HOW I COULDN'T PROTECT ARACHNE OR SOME SHIT? I'LL FUCKING KILL YOU!!"
Well, of all the meltdowns I ever expected to see Giricco to have... Yeah, okay, that was actually right at the top of the list. So he does actually give a shit about what happened to Arachne, after all! Although, on the other hand, I personally thought that we would be more likely to see Giricco show some evidence of getting pissed at or blaming Noah before we were going to see a Fruedian slip about him blaming himself for Arachne's death.
Giricco! He's like an onion! You know, with the layers and stuff! We're learning all sorts of interesting things about him this chapter! For example: He's a pedophile! He likes rough sex! He rapes and murders women as a hobby, apparently! He's a bit sensitive about the whole sleeping-through-Arachne's death thing!
I hereby declare this chapter the official Giricco Gives TMI Chapter. Because, wow. I mean, just wow.
Meanwhile, Maka has at least gotten up off the bed. "Maka, what are you doing?!" Soul snaps at her. "Hurry up and get ready to fight him!!"
Maka holds Soul in his scythe form, but she doesn't look ready to fight at all. In fact, she's staring at Giricco with a deer-caught-in-the-headlights look on her face.
"HERE HE COMES!" Soul shouts.
Well, okay. I guess that the next page is supposed to be Giricco making an attack move against Maka. He looks more like he's busting a move rather than trying to kill someone, though.
Maka barely manages to block Giricco's first kick by holding up Soul's handle, but unfortunately doing so leaves her lower body and legs unprotected. "BELOW!!" Soul shouts. Maka barely manages to block Giricco in time to save her legs from getting amputated. Except that she's blocking with Soul's handle again, instead of swinging his blade down like he asked her to.
Suddenly one of the zombie girls from the Envy chapter is there. I guess this is what Index meant when he said that the sins of each chapter would keep following them into each subsequent chapter. Huh. "You couldn't even swing a mop, let alone a proper scythe," the zombie girl says.
Giricco manages to kick Soul's blade with enough force to send Maka flying backward.
"MAKA!!" Soul shouts. "We're in the middle of a battle! CONCENTRATE!"
"You're just a cowardly girl, making the men do everything for you..." another zombie says.
Maka makes a sad face and sad ellipses. Giricco kicks her again.
"Every time I think we're getting somewhere, it's like we're starting all over again..." Giricco says. "Man, even I'm getting bored with this shit... Maybe I should just finish you off with one quick atttack and be done with it..."
Soul grits his teeth and reaches his breaking point. (Wait, Soul in scythe form is still NOT NAKED ANYMORE? GDI, Ohkubo, this is starting to piss me off! Especially since Tsubaki and Liz and even Jackie are still always naked in their weapon forms. I mean, come on!) Anywhoo, Soul transforms back into his human form, steps in front of Maka, stares Giricco down, and says, "Maka, you just stand back there and watch." Soul turns his arm into a blade. "I'll fight him alone."
MEANWHILE!
Chapter Seven: Greed
I dunno what all is going on this chapter, but none of Our Heroes appear to be paying attention to the chapter anyway. Patti, Kirikou, and Black Star are mocking Tsubaki and Liz with a chant. "Per~verts! Per~verts! Per~verts! Per~verts! Per~verts!"
Suddenly, Liz and Tsubaki both spotaneously start growing their boobs back!
"Yay, they're back!!" Liz says, grinning.
So this is the final moment, then. Kirikou grins and comments, "This is the moment that will finally decide which of the two of them is the perviest, once and for all..."
Liz and Tsubaki close their eyes, clasp their hands, and pray together. Please don't let me be the last. Please don't let me be the last. Please don't let me be the last!
Aaaaaaand Liz changes back first. "YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!" Liz does a victory fist-pump while Tsubaki stares on in horror.
"No way..." Tsubaki says. "This can't be..."
Liz and Patti point at Tsubaki and start chanting together. "Per~vert! Per~vert! Per~vert! Per~vert! Per~vert!" Meanwhile, Tsubaki changes completely back. But it's too late. The damage is done.
"Oh, man," Black Star says. "I'd better not sleep in the same room with her anymore."
"You sleep in the same room with her?!" Kirikou says. "Dude, you're making me jealous here!"
"It's just because we don't have much space," Black Star says.
Meanwhile, Blair is bored with these shenanigans. Blair yawns loudly, then comments, "Either way, they're both boring women."
Oh, snap. Liz stares at Blair and says, "So, uh, by the way, do you think Blair has gone back to being female yet?"
"No no no, she has to still be a tomcat!!" Tsubaki cuts in, perhaps a bit desperately. "Obviously! Right?"
MEANWHILE!
Tezca, Enrique, Stein, Marie, Sid, and Nygus are standing in what appears to be a forest, looking down at the abandoned church building where Noah is presumably lurking. Because that's all that Noah's been doing for the past couple chapters. Lurking. In between bouts of making ineffective villainous plots and re-organizing his collection of toenail clippings from all of the original members of KISS, Noah pretty much does nothing but lurk around all day, doesn't he?
Well, there was that one time that he did that one thing with the Brew. You know, that one time. That he did that one thing. That one thing that we still haven't found out what exactly it is yet. GDI, Ohkubo. GDI.
"This is it," Tezca says. "This is the hideout that Noah's gang is using. Justin is here, too..."
Why yes, he is. Justin is there. As we can see. As Ohkubo has deemed important enough to show us in one small panel on the bottom of the page. For some reason. Uh.
MEANWHILE!
Noah looks down at his book and comments, "They've reached the Greed chapter."
Waffles looks on with a stoic expression on his face. Noah-samaaaaa, he think-bubbles.
OMFG
HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA
OMG Waffles is just standing there and looking like -_- and he's still actually think-bubbling "Noah-samaaaa" I mean oh my god holy shit
WAFFLES. IS. FUCKING. EPIC.
"I won't let anybody take my collection from me," Noah says.
MEANWHILE!
Giricco is kicking Soul's ass. Like, really kicking Soul's ass. He is kicking Soul's ass all over the room.
"Soul!!" Maka shouts.
Soul makes with an epic arm-blade (is this the first newly-evolved arm blade form we've seen since Soul became a Death Scythe?), but Giricco easily blocks Soul's blade with his foot. "Don't you dare touch my technician!" Soul snarls at Giricco.
"You think I'm gonna let you get away with sayin' shit like that, after you cut my lady to pieces?!" Giricco shoots back.
Giricco smacks Soul around some more, then begins screaming at him again. "HA HA HA HA HA!! Just because you became a Death Scythe, that don't mean that you can fight alone!! Don't get cocky with me, you little shit of a scythe!!"
"I can at least fight alone against some worthless asshole like you!!" Soul shoots back. He's not very convincing with this boast, however, considering that in the very same panel he's gritting his teeth as blood spurts from his shoulder.
"YOU AIN'T NOTHIN' LIKE JUSTIN AN' ME!!" Giricco suddenly shouts. "DON'T FORGET YOUR PLACE!!" Then he kicks Soul in the chest.
Soul goes down. Giricco grabs Soul's arm and says, "Now I'm gonna cut your soul right outta your body. Look and learn, kid."
"GUAAAAAAAAA!" Soul screams as Giricco starts to bloodily cut into him.
"HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!" Giricco laughs as Soul's blood sprays all over him.
Suddenly Giricco lets Soul go. Soul slumps to his knees, blood gushing from his chest. Giricco then kicks Soul hard enough to send him flying across the room. Or the chapter. Room, chapter, whatever.
Maka stares at Soul.
Soul tries to get up, but he can't. Blood gushes from the wounds on his chest. "Dammit..." Soul says to the floor. "I can't do anything alone..." He continues talking to the floor. "But this isn't anything like the courage that Maka has always shown me up until now!"
Maka's soul goes poof!
Giricco gets this look on his face. This uh, did I just see that chick get a powerup from the power of twu wuv? look on his face.
Maka's face sets with determination. I'm such an idiot...
Soul finally manages to stand up. Kind of. Not very well, but at least he's trying. "This time it's my turn to show you what courage really means," he tells Maka.
COURAGE MEANS SUICIDE. That is what I have learned from this chapter.
Maka stares at Soul's back. No matter how much of an effect the book might have on me... For me to not believe in Soul...
MEANWHILE!
"Well, cookie crumb?" Gooberkins asks. "This is 'power'. Free from all reason or restraint, free to recklessly pursue all of your desires. What is the 'power' that you have obtained?"
"A symmetry that surpasses symmetry," Kid answers. "It is called 'oblivion'."
"One who desires power is approaching," Gooberkins says. "The power of your 'oblivion'... Shall we test it out?"
Panel zooms in on Black Star.
Kid grins. "Interesting." He looks down at Black Star. "Very well. I will make out with Black Star."
"...No. No. That's... That's really not what I was talking about."
All joking aside though, blah blah blah end of chapter. Next month: APOCALYPTIC AND VAGUELY HOMOEROTIC FISTFIGHT OF DOOM - THE REMATCH!
Although I, for one, will be incredibly disappointed if it turns out that Black Star is going to punch the crazy out of Kid in a sort of dramatic mirror repetition of what happened when Kid bunched the crazy out of Black Star way back all of those chapters ago. Because that would mean that Liz and Patti would end up contributing nothing to Kid's rescue and JESUS CHRIST OHKUBO, no, we have all been waiting faaaaaaaaaar too long for Liz and Patti to have their Crowning Moment of Awesome in this manga and you are NOT goint to let Black Star steal their thunder, are you? Are you?!
God I hope not.
Meanwhile: Brew? What Brew? Crona? What Crona? Medusa? What Medusa? Pshawwww, details. They're not important anymore.
Edit: Corrected a translation error as pointed out by
anitheanimanic. Okay NOW Giricco's line about Justin actually makes sense!Edit again: And yet again, it is necessary for me to make a public service announcement about one of my recap posts. GDI, fandom. GDI.